[
Home | View
other Q&A |
Search | Ask the
Professors a Question | Next
| Previous
| Up
]
View Covert Intelligence Reports
From: Karey- In Kansas
How do I make sure I don't marry a mommy, what warning signs should I look for while we are dating?
Karey,
Unfortunately, you WILL marry a Mommy. They are nearly everywhere. The question is what level Mommy may she be? If you heed our advice and are lucky in general you may limit yourself to a Minor Mommy.
There are two warning signs you can watch for that limit your exposure to the tidal wave that may be in your future.
Warning sign #1- Size, Shape, and Attitude of the potential Mommy-in-law. Even though the potential Mommy-in-law will disguise herself the best she can, if she’s of the Tsunami class, she is susceptible to your decoding efforts. You see, because she’s most likely 20 years older than you she just won’t have the sexpower to distort your sensors.
Watch for “downturned mouth”, “armcrossing” and “lackoftalking” as points of interest. Lackoftalking is a strong indicator of having nothing nice to say.
Watch also the weight-to-age ratio. We all gain some weight with age, but Super-Sized Mommies have a weight to age ratio of 5:1 or greater. This warning sign is the most consistently predictable because the acorn just doesn’t fall very far from the tree.
Warning sign #2- Does she do EVERYTHING you want to do? Gal pals that go along with your every whim are one of two things, both bad.
First, they may be simply boring and have no life or interests of their own.
Second, and more likely, they are the dangerous Pre-Mommy Raptors so common in the dating wilderness. These women go chameleon in a desperate attempt to make the prey feel like the king of world and that married life will be just like the cloud-9 dating process. The most common result of wedlock with these huntresses is the hapless husband asking over and over- WHAT HAPPENED?
Happy Hunting!