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Ask the Professor Q&A
Location: at "Large"
Reporting: Prof. Bakeman
A headline caught my eye in today's paper.
"Women eating 300 calories per day more than in 1970."
Even though we all know the size and shape of any given Mommy can vary, this was alarming news. It’s impossible to tell if a particular women is a Mommy unless you take our proven test. But this weight thing affects all women! 300 additional calories a day since 1970... it’s no wonder many Mommies have added some girth.
It’s a good thing the annual diets to nowhere take the edge off an otherwise expanding Mammoth Mommy. If not we’d have forty and fifty year old Mommies out there tipping the scales at 1,163 pounds (arrived at by multiplying 34 years by 365 days and then by 300 calories and then dividing that number by 3500 since 3500 calories equal one pound of weight.).